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    Napoleon Bonaparte

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    August 15, 1769 – May 5, 1821

    Don't worry, nation of France, Napoleon was not Jewish. He was not secretly a Talmudic scholar. He did not enjoy bagels with lox (did they even have bagels back then?). He did not make Josephine shave off her hair after they got married. Well, at least as far as we know.

    But he did declare France the "Homeland of the Jews".

    No, seriously, he did. But don't take our word for it. Let him speak for himself.

    "My primary desire was to liberate the Jews and make them full citizens. I wanted to confer upon them all the legal rights of equality, liberty and fraternity as was enjoyed by the Catholics and Protestants. It is my wish that the Jews be treated like brothers as if we were all part of Judaism."

    Hooray! Way to go, Little Corporal! Vive le France! Vive Napoleon!

    But... why would he, after centuries of oppression, give Jews such freedoms? Did he have a secret Jewish ancestry? Maybe those bagels and lox did make it to his breakfast table?

    The answer is simpler than that. And we'll let him speak again.

    "As an added benefit, I thought that this would bring to France many riches because the Jews are numerous..."

    Great. More stereotypes about Jews and money. So nauseating.

    But y'know what? We'll take it. Still better than the Germans.

    Verdict: Sadly, Not a Jew.

    October 19, 2009

    See Also

    Alexander the Great

    Herz Cerfbeer


    Peter the Great

    Nicolas Sarkozy
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