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    The Devil

    Jew Score:



    (Satan / Lucifer / The Prince of Darkness)

    There is no hell in Judaism. Apparently, life itself is punishment enough.

    When we die we are simply cast to the winds. Ashes to ashes. Dust to dust. Whether that's good news or bad probably depends on your perspective. Or how good a person you've been. All those years pretending to like people — wasted!

    There are some positives, though. For example, there is no infernal overlord waiting in the hellfires below to nosh on our kosher souls. And while there are certainly icons of evil in Judaism (dybbuks, devils, Jews for Jesus), we lack that true villainous fiend plotting our demise from afar. Ironic considering the history of Jews.

    Anyway, this makes the idea of a Jewish devil seem a little odd. How can we be something that we ourselves don't believe in? That's getting a little existential for this website, isn't it?

    On the other hand, our good friends the goyim certainly think he is a Jew. The classic picture of the horned, bearded, big-nosed Beelzebub screams anti-Jewish propaganda. Maybe the pitchfork is for spearing creamed herrings?

    And if you think about it, there's something about ol' Scratch we find attractive. After all, the Devil's only job is to judge and then punish goyim. Does it get any better than that? Y'know, now that we think about it, maybe the Devil could be...

    Y'know what? Let's just leave it at that. Hell or no, we're heading somewhere in a handbasket.

    Anyone else feeling a little warm?

    Verdict: Not a Jew.

    August 18, 2008

    See Also

    Archangel Michael



    Anton LaVey

    Saint Peter
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