Stewardess: Would you like something to read?
Woman: Do you have anything light?
Stewardess: How about this leaflet, "Famous Jewish Sports Legends?"
Thank you, Zucker-Abrahams-Zucker, for that exchange, which was as funny then as it is now. Hell, every time we add another Jew to the Athletes category, we need to affirm in the profile that we're going against the stereotype. Even then, our list does not have many sports legends on it. Sandy Koufax? Of course, but after him... Mathieu Schneider? Come on.
But then we have Mark Spitz, who, at the 1972 Olympics, set the record that wasn't approached before — and for three decades since. 100 meter butterfly. Gold. 100 meter freestyle. Gold. 200 meter butterfly. Gold... Gold. Gold. Gold. Gold. Seven golds. The Flying Finn Paavo Nurmi? Never more than five. Carl Lewis? An ordinary four. We laugh at you, Carl Lewis. A Jewish Sports Legend you are not.
And let's not forget Spitz's performance in 1968 in Mexico City, when he started his Olympic career with two golds, a silver, and a bronze, giving him a total of 11 medals from just two Olympics. Leaflet? You need more than a leaflet to deal with Spitz alone; "Famous Jewish Sports Legends" needs to be at least a pamphlet.
Take that, Zucker-Abrahams-Zucker.