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    Monica Lewinsky

    Jew Score:



    July 23, 1973 —

    Not our proudest moment.

    Coitus with the Commander in Chief isn't so bad. After all, plenty of people more beautiful or famous have been implicated in pleasuring the most powerful man in the world. In fact, if Kennedy really did have Marilyn Monroe, it reflected well on him. It only adds to his mystique.

    No, the fact that Monica was involved in a little extramarital fondling of the Presidential putz wasn't the worst thing. The fact that she came off as such a doofus afterward is the problem.

    She's every Jewish boy's worst nightmare — clutchy and controlling with a smidgen of daddy complex. We've all dated one. Or known someone who did. Seeing her come out on the national stage was like seeing Uncle Chaim drunk on Manischewitz in front of your entire high school —a terrible embarrassment brought to life in front of everyone you hoped would never see.

    Monica Lewinski is a living embodiment of our worst stereotype, live and in full color on the ten o'clock news. We were trying to keep her kind secret from the goyim and there she goes making us national news. Now we're greedy, short, guilt-giving AND empty-headed sluts? Wonderful.

    So she shared a few cigars with Clinton. That, we can live with. But setting back feminism AND Judaism 40 years at the same time?


    Not our proudest moment.

    Verdict: Jew.

    October 27, 2006

    See Also

    Bill Clinton

    Al Gore

    Marilyn Monroe

    Marguerite Steinheil

    Rachel Uchitel
    © Jew or Not Jew, 2006-2021.