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    Kobe Bryant

    Jew Score:



    August 23, 1978 – January 26, 2020

    Everyone has dreams of what they'll be when they grow up.

    Firefighters and astronauts (and pirates, apparently) are fairly typical. In Japan, an inordinate number of children want to pilot giant robots when they grow up (now there's a recipe for disappointment). When we were growing up, we wanted to be writers. Hey, sometimes this stuff just works out.

    Certainly, a common American dream is to be a pro basketball star. We didn't have that dream. Maybe because the reality of being short, Jewish and unathletic was too heavy a load, even for dreams. But a lot of kids today do. Which means a lot of kids today are in for a letdown.

    And the kids who do make it to the NBA to live out their dream? What do they dream about? Well, according to a 2006 interview, Kobe Bryant "wouldn't mind being Jewish."

    Really, Kobe?

    "I wouldn't mind. Really."

    OK, then... Hey, in a world where "giant robot pilot" is considered acceptable, even expected, maybe Kobe's dreams aren't too far fetched.

    But we think he'd be better off sticking to basketball.

    Verdict: Not a Jew.

    January 18, 2009

    See Also

    Jerry Buss

    Julius Erving

    Jordan Farmar

    Rudy LaRusso
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