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    Kevin Pillar

    Jew Score:



    January 4, 1989 —

    In 2005, Rockies starting shortstop Clint Barmes broke his collarbone while carrying a load of deer meat.

    In 2009, Carlos Quentin decided to change things up and instead of using his bat to hit, he hit his own bat and broke his wrist.

    Brett Barberie once missed a game because he got hot sauce in his eyes.

    Glenallen Hill had a nightmare about spiders and crashed through a glass table near his bed.

    Marty Cordova, an outfielder for the Orioles, had to miss a game because of severe burns from a tanning machine (apparently standing outside all day wasn't enough)

    Joel Zumaya more or less ended his career by playing too much Guitar Hero — he hurt his arm and was never the same.

    And yes, Kevin Pillar missed the beginning of the 2015 baseball season because of a sneeze that tore his oblique muscle.

    All of this is to say that lots of baseball players suffer dumb injuries and Pillar's achoo boo boo is not some sign of Jewish athleticism or Woody Allen-esque trauma.

    But still...

    Verdict: Jew.

    October 16, 2015

    See Also

    Wade Boggs

    Paul Goldschmidt

    Shawn Green

    Joc Pederson

    Rowdy Tellez
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