According to Frank Sinatra, his mother used to tell him, "I think that I'm half Italian and half Jew."

Don't worry, goyishe readers! Feel free to jump ahead to the verdict. We are not going to claim Ol' Blue Eyes. He'd still score a perfect 15 on ItalianOrItalian.com. His mother only considered the possibility of Jewish ancestry because she came from Genoa, which was known for its bankers and lawyers.

Don't worry, Jewish readers! There was nothing antisemitic about her claim. She thought she might have been Jewish because "I'm smart, [Genoa is] where they came from, where I came from." Terrific logic by Mrs. Sinatra!

Yet we have to pour some water on her reasoning. There are so many Italians who are absolutely brilliant without being Jewish: Da Vinci! Galileo! Volta! Marconi! Fermi! Modigliani! Well, the last one was actually Jewish, but you get the drift.

As for Frank? Well, he did shtup Mia Farrow, who them shtupped Woody Allen... Two degrees away from a Jew?